“Can we ask the donkey out for a cerveza?” – Paco
I spent some time thinking about the perfect litmus test for whether or not you will enjoy Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time, and I think I nailed it. If you find the following words — written in a child’s handwriting in crayon on elementary school-style paper — to be the least bit funny, then this show is for you:
“Make a creep stick his penis in a bowl of piranhas.”
I’m guilty as charged (and perhaps should be charged with something?) as I find myself giggling even in conveying this bit from a sketch that walks the tightrope between funny and disturbing. That is, Nick Swardson’s toddler is diagnosed with a fatal illness (you’re cracking up already, right?), which is then used as a device for Nick to go around with these hand-written cards that are ostensibly from the toddler’s “bucket list.” They include sleeping with his friend Bill’s wife and, yes, making a creep stick his… well, you know. And yeah, they show the results. It’s sick sick sick. And funny. If you’re sick. Like me. Like I said, guilty as charged.
Nick Swardson has the kind of lazily amiable personality that allows him to push the envelope hard on his comedy and still allow the audience to be in on the joke. It’s the kind of thing that would never in a million years fly on broadcast television (not even the bland-as-milquetoast Last Comic Standing) but may have a shot at finding cult status on Comedy Central (Tuesdays at 10pm).
I’ve been a big fan of Swardson since I saw him play the role of Alex’s nerd’s nerd friend Jeff in Grandma’s Boy (Swardson tearing up and tearing down Dance Dance Revolution in that flick is worth the price of admission alone), and he has appeared in a number of films and TV roles (including Terry on Reno 911!) over the years. That said, I sense he’s not quite a household name. Pretend Time likely won’t get him there but may well help to cement his status as an edgy comedic actor and performer who will dare go places that others will not.
Not all of the sketches in this pilot episode worked to be sure, but there were enough laughs in a fast-moving half hour that left me wanting more by the end. And that’s saying something because some of the bits stretched past places where even I feel comfortable, such as the donkey “live sex show” sketch where an HR rep gathers the employees of a live sex show establishment (which has all Latino employees and looks to be located in Tijuana) to discuss sexual harassment policy. The idea is pretty funny, and even having the contrast of a staid corporate meeting going on while being able to view (partially, thankfully) the show going on behind a glass partition works, but let’s just say it devolves from there in ways I could have lived without.
Then there are bits that are simply more silly than funny, such as an advertisement for the Toyota Peeus, a car that runs on your own “renewable fuel.” “I hope everyone remembered not to go before we left the house!” Dad announces, before pulling off to the side of the road and holding up his son so that he can urinate directly into the gas tank. And then, just because, we learn that the Peeus has been voted #1 car in Urine Fetish Magazine.
“Mr. Stitches: Wheelchair Cat, Trust Fund Kitty” was one of the more fully formed set pieces, and it generally delivered the goods. Again, if you’re the kind of person that finds a talking cat in a wheelchair funny, then you are in the right demo for this style of comedy. Add to that the fact that Mr. Stitches likes to trash talk, party, and get with the ladies and drugs (and not necessarily in that order) then you get an idea of the atmosphere that Pretend Time conjures up for our viewing pleasures. “Follow the flour, snow ho’s,” Mr. Stitches announces as he leads his entourage of women to enjoy a good snort in the club’s bathroom.
Gay Robot, a central character in a 2006 pilot that never made air, also makes an appearance and looks to be a recurring bit. It’s pretty much self-explanatory, but the back story worth mentioning is that a scientist spilled a wine cooler on a robot he was working on so “it turned out gay.” In Pretend Time, Gay Robot inexplicably works as a bar’s doorman and therefore has the opportunity to evaluate the clientele coming in.
I’m not sure that I’ll be making Pretend Time regular viewing anytime soon, but I will look forward to checking in with Swardson’s sweetly twisted world every now and again.
This review originally appeared on TV Geek Army.