We’re rolling through every episode of Key and Peele on Pop Thruster. Here we go with “The Branding,” Season 1 Episode 4. Follow along on the journey!
Also: check out ALL 351 Key & Peele Sketches Ranked (In Painstakingly Funny Detail)!
The Bank Job
“Motherf—er, that’s called a job!” – Peele
Two dudes are plotting out what looks like a major heist. Key lays out the master plan – the longest of “long cons” if you will: get hired as bank tellers, work for twenty or thirty years, “they deposit the money into our bank accounts,” and then… just walk away, like nothing ever happened. Short. Sweet. Funny.
The Branding
“Omega Pi Omega!” – K&P
K&P are college bros with long dreadlocks. We join the action as Peele literally brands Key as part of some hideous rite of passage for fraternity Omega Pi Omega. Key then returns the favor, branding Peele right in the chest… however, it’s a little bit off center. Key keeps trying, but he’s not getting it quite right, so that branding iron gets all kinds of action up and down Peele’s body (and man, it truly looks hideous and painful). And finally, wouldn’t you know it, the branding/wounds look like… male genitalia. “That could be a rocket ship, or lighthouse,” Key tries to assure him, but then lays it out: “No man, you got a dick on your chest.”
Slow News Day
“That horse had a big old snake head!” – Key
It’s a slow news day, so a local TV reporter decides to walk up to a guy in front of his house and ask him if he’s seen a Pegasus that’s been reported in the area. The guy – Key, in particularly goofy mode – says, “Aw yeah, I seen a Pegasus!” Peele pops up, and they both corroborate that they’ve seen a Pegasus “every day.” Soon, it seems, everybody in the neighborhood has seen the Pegasus, argued about the Pegasus, is attempting to sell Pegasus t-shirts – or even looking to hunt down the Pegasus. Meanwhile, the news Chyron for Channel 6 reads PEGASUS SIGHTING. This one has a bit of a live action South Park sketch with a K&P spin.
The Negraph
“Uh oh. You just dropped the n-word, but you’re not an ‘n.’” – Key
A white guy casually drops the n-word at a party, and it’s a record scratch moment. Key, in a weird-looking sweater vest, then steps in front of the entire scene and says, “Uh oh, you just dropped the n-word, but you’re not an ‘n.’ Lucky for you, there’s a way to avoid these situations.” He then introduces a mobile app called The Negraph, which tells you “whether or not you can drop the n-word.” Sidenote that both Anders Holm of Workaholics fame and Rob Delaney both make cameos in what’s now a commercial (The Negraph tells them both that they “can’t say it.”)
Dungeons & Dragons
“Where the club at, Isildor, yo?” – Tyrell
A group of nerdy dudes are playing Dungeon & Dragons, but it’s obvious that the Dungeon Master’s (Key) cousin, Tyrell (Peele), is new to the role-playing adventure game. Tyrell demands to have his character be named Kanye, and he is to be a giant: “But I wanna be a giant yo… all big.” Tyrell quickly puts the game off its intended course by taking his and other characters (with the players controlling those characters suddenly on board) to a club within the game to get their drink on, and to quest for “bitches” instead of the Lance of Caldahar. The Dungeon Master finally hits his breaking point when “Kanye the Giant” wants to play his “demo CD” in his SUV that he and his new fantasy entourage have waiting outside the club.
The Record Deal
“It fell through… it’s not happening.” – Craig
Craig (Peele) walks out of his building and says into his phone, “So it’s definitely happening, we’re making a record.” Key then nearly jumps him and says, “I heard about your record deal, dog.” This soon leads to everyone in the neighborhood knowing about the record deal, each with their own opinion about it – stay true to your roots, keep it real, and so on. As a parade like atmospheric gets going, Craig then gets another call: the deal’s off. He turns around to… an empty street.
Luther, Obama’s Anger Translator #2
“Who killed Osama bin Laden?” – Luther
Obama (Peele) and Luther (Key) are back, and it’s the first time we’ve ever had a K&P recurring sketch. This time around, the duo is gearing up for election season. The cadence between the two is fantastic – Obama calmly extolling the accomplishments of his first administration, and Luther exulting about how taking out the guy behind 9/11 beats anything that the opposition (Mitt Romney, from the quainter time of 2012) could do or say.
Tha Incredible Mack
“I got shot in the dick!” – Tha Incredible Mack
It’s a straight up rap video, with Peele as a rapper called Tha Incredible Mack. We soon learn that his penis “got in between” a bullet and… the rest of his body, presumably, which cuts to the chorus of, “I got shot in the dick!” And then we see Tha Incredible Mack sporting an Incredible Cast that sticks out of his… uh, pants. “But his dick’s still standing,” his background singers tell us, comfortingly. The line that made me laugh most: “Went back to my palace fast / Now I’m the dude walking ‘round with a phallus cast.”
Some stats and info about Key & Peele, “The Branding”
TV SHOW – Key and Peele
SEASON/EPISODE – Season 1, Episode 4
AIRED ON – February 14th, 2012
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – Comedy Central/Hulu
GENRE – Comedy, Sketch Comedy
CREATED BY – Keegan-Michael Key, Jordan Peele