“Yeah, those mothers just left their kids here in a bar with complete strangers in a pageant that’s under investigation.” – Sweet Dee
The gang’s newest patriotism kick inspires a newfound appreciation for the age-old tradition of child pageantry. After getting involved in a suspicious deal with a guy who turns out to be pedophile, Frank opts to follow through with the pageant in order to prove that he’s not a “diddler.” Dennis, Mac, and Charlie take this as an opportunity to feature a song-and-dance performance of their own, while Dee recruits a reluctant contestant in order to relive the Sunny Spots from her childhood pageant days.
Frank’s crossover makeover
It was really subtle, but Frank (Danny DeVito) progressively lives out the role of the Penguin (also Danny DeVito) from Batman Returns while trying to prove that he’s not a “Diddler.” From his broken nose gushing blood, to his mortician’s makeover which – without the villain’s signature beaked nose – makes him look like he came straight from his own wake, his transformation culminates in his being overheard in a ruinous conversation with the mortician which is broadcast to the entire pageant.
Mac, Charlie, and Dennis choreograph an updated “Yankee Doodle”
The pageant’s underdog is the lone boy in the competition, whose flamboyance gives the kid from Curb Your Enthusiasm a run for his money. They try to help his routine with a techno mix of “Yankee Doodle,” which, pitifully, is a fairly accurate representation of real child pageantry.
Dee’s glory days
Dee was never good at pageants, but at least she worked hard at practicing for them. Spurred on by her mother’s scorn and an antagonizing ten year-old, Dee takes command of another girl’s routine after seeing a bit of herself in the disinterested contestant.
Artemis
Need I say more? In her first appearance of the season, Artemis is called in to control the sound board, which she takes as an opportunity to smoke up. Her getting high doesn’t seem to bother any of the parents – they have bigger concerns to deal with.
“It’s like throwing a picnic at the beach and getting pissed when the seagulls show up.” –Mac
There’s no arguing with Mac’s apt analogy of child pageants – and who else would know better than to throw a picnic on the beach? When a man pretending to be a standards official gets busted as a completely unrelated “diddler,” the Gang eventually concludes that there’s no pride in child pageantry. You know something is wrong when the Gang unanimously agrees that it’s a line they won’t cross.
Some stats and info about It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, ” Frank Reynolds’ Little Beauties”
TV SHOW – It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia
SEASON/EPISODE – Season 7, Episode 3
AIRED ON – September 29th, 2011
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – FX, FXX, Hulu
GENRE – Comedy, Office Culture
CREATED BY – Rob McElhenney, Glenn Howerton
CAST – Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Glenn Howerton, Kaitlin Olson, Danny DeVito
This review originally appeared on TV Geek Army.