“Get back out my face, man. You smell like barbecue tater chips.” – T.I.
“Television will rot your brain,” goes the old refrain. As a someone who loves TV, I would ordinarily take umbrage with this sentiment, but after watching T.I. and Tiny: The Family Hustle, it’s hard to argue with it. T.I. and Tiny is one of those shows that make you feel like you just took a massive hit of PCP, brain cells bursting left and right, gray matter collapsing in on itself.
When I reviewed the show after its premiere</a>, I questioned why VH1 would decide to make a show about T.I. and his wife, “Tiny” Tameka Harris, being parents. “I have a small issue with VH1 airing a show about family and parenting starring a man who was charged with weapon and drug offenses,” I said. I stand by this assessment and now, having seen last night’s episode, I’m willing to take it a step further. T.I. and Tiny have become something much worse than gun-toting drug users. They have become… STAGE PARENTS!
As a famous musician, one would think that T.I. is well aware of the trappings and bullshit that come with the entertainment industry and he would want to keep his kids as far away from that world as possible. However, it’s quite the contrary. T.I. and Tiny are pushing their young sons, King and Major (?!), to be actors.
In an attempt to jump start their careers, Tiny whisks the lads off to Hollywood. First she takes them to a photographer for headshots. This process is relatively painless. The kids are just asked to stand in front of backdrop and strike adorable poses. No problem.
After the photographer, the boys go to a casting agent. “King really wanted this opportunity. I hope he doesn’t blow it,” Tiny says. No, dummy, you really wanted this opportunity. King wanted to play Halo and eat barbecue tater chips. King, being a little kid with no real desire to act, gets nervous in front of the casting lady and locks up. Like a true stage parent, Tiny drags him out into the hallway and gives him a stern talking to. He goes back in and tries to loosen up a little bit, but it’s clear that he would rather be anywhere else in the world. I feel ya’, King. Sitting on my couch watching The Family Hustle, I’d rather be anywhere else in the world too.
This review originally appeared on TV Geek Army.