“When people function this early in the morning, this isn’t real life to me. This is like a video game.” –Snooki
Jersey Shore Season 4 Rankings: where did “Damage Is Done?” rank?
Jersey Shore’s “Damage Is Done” is the #6 ranked episode of Jersey Shore’s fourth season. Find more Jersey Shore rankings here.
Here’s why “Damage Is Done” was ranked as the #6 episode of Jersey Shore’s wild fourth season.
CATEGORY – TV
SHOW – Jersey Shore
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – MTV
GENRE – Reality TV, Drama, Comedy, Trashtastic TV
EPISODE – “Damage Is Done”
BEING RANKED FOR – Jersey Shore Season 4
RANK – #6 of Jersey Shore’s fourth season
Jersey Shore, “Damage Is Done” (S0410) review
God bless the Guadagninos. If it weren’t for their hospitality towards Mike, Ronnie, Pauly D, and their actual relative, Vinny, this episode would’ve been an endlessly grating Snooki-Jionni-Mike debacle. That tired dynamic was still in the mix, but thanks to the boys’ pilgrimage to Sicily and the girls’ wine tour in Tuscany, we got a brief respite, as well as a few hilarious culture clashes.
The beginning of the episode returns to what is apparently MTV’s favorite plotline: the alleged Mike-Snooki hook-up. Moments after Snooki flees Vinny’s bed, she wakes up poor JWoww and forces her into a 7 a.m. mimosa binge. I mean “breakfast.” But before they hit the town, JWoww tells Snooki about the digusting details Mike shared about their maybe-real-maybe-not sexual encounter. Snooki immediately screams that Mike’s a “crazypants” and, when he sleepily stumbles into her room, yells that they’re no longer friends. Mike has no doubt been called many things in his lifetime, but he won’t take “crazypants” lying down. Incensed, he calls his friend, who was the sole male witness to the night with Snooki in question, to confirm his story. By the way, his friend’s name is The Unit. Interpret that as you will.
The Unit doesn’t so much validate the story as laugh at Mike’s account of it, but the phone call gives Mike an idea. He’ll tell the roommates (excepting Snooki and JWoww) that he gave The Unit Jionni’s number, so he could tell the guy all about how his girlfriend cheated on him with Mike. Mike considers this both a prank and means of determining who’s the rat, rather than an act of sadism by a sad attention whore. He first tells Ronnie, who’s pretty indifferent about the whole thing. But Sammi overhears the lie and tells Deena. Mike then repeats the lie to the girls, who are pretty pissed. Sammi tells him that’s f***ed up and he should’ve talked to Snooki first, Deena says she’s going to tell Snooki. That logically ends the who’s the rat game, right? We can stop this thing before it gets out of hand? Oh, right. This is The Jersey Shore. Logic means nothing here.
When JWoww and Snooki (who’s drunk, and thus primed for a screaming match) return, Sammi immediately tells Snooks what Mike said. Snooki goes into spider monkey mode and tries to attack Mike. When this fails, she starts throwing bottles at him. This goes on for a few minutes before Mike reveals that it was a joke and only proves Sammi is a rat. Snooki storms off to the patio, smoking and weeping. Mike claims she’s crying because she knows he’s right. Jesus is this kid an awful human being.
Thankfully, Vinny has planned a trip to visit his mom’s family in Sicily, with the boys, the next day. The girls, in turn, head off to Tuscany for a wine tour. Vinny is adorably excited to meet his Italian relatives, bouncing giddily and grinning as they prepare for departure. It only gets cuter when they actually arrive. Vinny enthusiastically greets each of his 324 cousins, shares family photos (including one from his “awkward phase”), and gives a heartfelt toast after their multi-course meal. Real sentiment apparently does exist on The Jersey Shore.
Another highlight from this excursion? Mike getting his bottom whooped in soccer.
Meanwhile, in Tuscany, the girls are busy making their way through several bottles of wine, though they begrudgingly listen to some boring people talk about the stuff they’re drinking first. Ugh, knowledge is so stupid. Once the woman serving their wine finishes her spiel, Snooki immediately brings up Jionni. (In case you were wondering, the server didn’t leave and has to listen to the entire ensuing conversation.) She wants the girls’ advice on what to do. JWoww breaks it down for her: You wanted out, you got out, you hooked up with Vinny, move on. Snooki is upset by this, because Jenni isn’t supposed to, you know, tell the truth. The fight continues at the next stop on their tour (after a quick snooze on the wine barrels), prompting Snooks to storm off yet again. Somehow, in spite of all this, the pair easily make up once they return to Florence.
Snooki calls her dad for advice on Jionni. Papa Snooki quickly reveals that the kid has changed his Facebook status to single. Before we move on, two things. One: When did Snooki’s dad, who always seemed so irritated with the show and his daughter’s antics on it, become such a gossip queen? Two: How do I become his Facebook friend?
Getting back on track, Snooki does not take this news well and calls up Jionni. He yells at her pretty much the second he answers, saying she broke his heart and that of course he’s single because she dumped him. She insists she only asked for a break, and then, because it seems the appropriate moment, tells him she hooked up with Vinny. She says they didn’t have sex, but Jionni hangs up. Yet when she calls the next day, he agrees to give her another chance. Here’s the problem: As all her roommates and millions of Americans know, Snooki <em>did</em> have sex with Vinny. Claiming to have blacked out a little, Snooki asks Vinny what really happened between them. He confirms the smush, which sets the stage for the dramatized final shot: Snooki telling Jionni she slept with Vinny.
Honestly, at this point, I don’t think anyone could care less what Jionni’s response is. And really, it seems that next week’s episode is more about the roommates’ problems with Mike than Snooki and Jionni. Mike’s sabotage is an issue that’s definitely been stewing, and needs to be addressed, but the next episode seems in danger of turning into another screaming match or, worse, a special episode. Then again, if special episode means Mike sobbing in a neck brace again, I’m totally on board.
More thoughts on “Damage Is Done”:
- “She’s like the fugitive right now, and I’m harboring information.” – Mike
- “I’m so tired right now, you crazy whore.” – JWoww
- JWoww and Snooki’s walk home from breakfast features yet another drunk Snooki montage. She wears some kind of souvenir chef hat, chases down a nun, buys an enormous jug of wine only to break it minutes later, and does a cartwheel down the street sans underwear. Seriously, Snooks: Panties aren’t that difficult to remember.
- “Mike’s dodging everything like The Matrix. She’s throwing wine bottles at him, he’s ducking them. He’s moving all around, he’s running from her.” – Pauly D
- “You would think he would learn to stop after a while, because he got punched in the face, he ran into a wall, and now he’s getting champagne bottles thrown at his head. How many wake up calls does Mike need?” – Vinny
- “You look so sophisticated and classy. Ew! Nicole, did you fart?” – Sammi
- “And there goes our class.” – Deena
- “I hope your family likes me.” -Pauly D “Oh they will, baby, don’t worry.” – Vinny
- “I’m seeing Sicily for the first time. It looks like Jurassic Park. There’s volcanoes and trees and mist and like King Kong is in the bushes. It’s really nothing like the Italy we’ve seen before.” –Vinny
- “This is definitely some Mafia-type shit. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen Godfather II, but it’s in Sicily.” – Mike (Somehow, I very much doubt Mike’s seen The Godfather Part II, either.)
- “We pull up and it’s a ranch. I’m like, ‘Four guidos in the woods? Uh, I don’t know about that.'” –Ronnie
- Sammi uses the word “rustic” to describe their first wine tour destination. Someone’s been using her word of the day calendar.
- The girls’ first wine tour guide clearly messes with Snooki, who thinks the place is spooky. When she asks if it’s haunted, he replies, “Not anymore,” but won’t answer when she frantically says, “What do you mean, ‘Not anymore’?!” He also tells the girls to “scream if you get lost.” Basically, he’s my favorite.
- “Cool, history. Boo! You know, like I’m not into geography anymore. Give me f—ing wine.” -Snooki
- “You don’t want us to do our own thing. We’d embarrass you.” – JWoww, when the server tells them to “do your own thing”
- This episode gave us one of the best transitions of the season when, after Vinny’s toast to his family, the camera cut to Deena and Snooki falling off a stranger’s motorbike.
- “Everything’s happening the way it’s supposed to be, and then all of a sudden, glitch in the matrix, bang Snooki, and then everything just continued the way it was happening before.” –Vinny
Jersey Shore, “Damage Is Done” episode and cast info
Air date – October 6, 2011
Paul “Pauly D” DelVecchio – Self
Jenni “JWoww” Farley – Self
Sammi “Sweetheart” – Self
Vinny Guagagino (later known as “Keto Guido”) – Self
Ronnie Margo – Self (as Ronnie Ortiz-Margo)
Angelina Pivarnick – Self
Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi – Self
Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino (later known as “Big Daddy Sitch” – Self