A pair of brothers try Patti’s patience.
Patti works with two muscle-headed brothers, Abe and David Cruz, on this edition of The Millionaire Matchmaker.
The co-owners of a faith-based clothing line called Forever Faith are also bodybuilders, but seem to have run aground when it comes to love. David married young and found out six months post-vows that his wife was cheating on him. He’s been scared to try again, but with Patti’s help is ready to jump back into dating again.
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Abe, on the other hand, is trying to overcome a checkered past. Incarcerated for three years, he’s fresh out of prison with his career back on track and his physical self in top shape, but he’s got a love radar set on the wrong kind of women.
Patti determines the bros need a small mixer and collects some down-to-earth women that will help these guys get back in the game. For David, Patti looks for women that have also been cheated on so there’s some inherent empathy. For Abe, she tries to collect women of a better class. She even throws in a ringer that old Abe would have jumped on so that she can test how serious he is about growing up and dating more wisely.
At the mixer, Patti is happy to see the men working the room nicely. Abe is turned off by the ringer and Patti breathes a sigh of relief. That’s not to say Abe isn’t a bit of an over-tanned lunkhead, but he’s at least making some progress.
For their mini dates, David chooses Ayla and Courtney. Abe goes with Tiffany and Christina. David bonds nicely with outdoorsy, Colorado native Ayla, but not as much with beauty school grad Courtney. Elsewhere, Abe tries to get surfer gal Christina to offer him some surfing lessons but she’s clueless and doesn’t bite. However Tiffany, who has a very busy career seems to be up for Abe – but she won’t tell him her age. Smart woman.
At selection time, David picks Ayla and Abe selects Tiffany. The bonehead boys decide to welcome the women to their double date in separate limos headed to the same location – their favorite gym. Dressed to impress, the women look a little deflated but never-the-less are game to go work out. Tiffany, as a fitness teacher, is already exhausted from two classes she taught pre-date but she goes along. As an aside, if there’s one thing I can tell the blockheads on this show it’s “Don’t test the women with stupid surprise physical exertion dates.” Who the hell wants to spend time looking good only to be told that all that first impression labor was a waste and you’re going to sweat and look your worst right out the gate. Epic FAIL, gentleman.
Inside the gym, David is a smitten kitten for Ayla. He’s practically seeing moonbeams coming out of her smile. He gets a little handsy as he spots her and then goes in for a cute kiss on the cheek. Abe gets all macho and tries to school Tiffany in their workout but she quickly turns the tables on him and makes him sweat through some harsh routines. Paybacks a bitch, buddy. However, she is impressed by his roided out guns. To each his own, I guess.
The couples then split up for separate dinners and David and Ayla have super sparkage. He gets his inner gentleman and confidant man out, orders for her and keeps the conversation lively. He asks her to pray with him before they eat and she seems impressed. They have a lot of things to talk about and common interests. As dinner comes to a close, he goes in for a kiss and it turns into a reciprocal make-out session.
Abe and Tiffany aren’t finding as much simpatico. She asks him about his business and the inspiration for it, and he admits his prison time. She appreciates the honesty so score one for Abe. But then he goes off the rails when he tells her he likes to Jacuzzi at the end of the night and he’d like her to join him. It’s not even a subtle attempt to see her assets in a bikini and Tiffany isn’t biting. She says she’s got an early morning and won’t be able to make it a late night. From then on, it’s awkward.
In Patti’s office, the guys come in for a chat. Patti tells David that Ayla is enamored and she’s proud of him for opening up and being such a gentleman. Then she tells Abe his Jacuzzi move was stupid. He blushes and she says he has a lot of work to do on himself and his game if he’s going to find true love. She tells him to look up to David’s example, who looks to have created a love match with Ayla.
Some stats and info about The Millionaire Matchmaker – “The Brothers Cruz”
TV SHOW – The Millionaire Matchmaker
SEASON/EPISODE – Season 5, Episode 9
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – Bravo
GENRE – Reality TV, Dating Shows, Trashtastic TV
STARS – Patti Stanger, Destin Pfaff, Rachel Federoff, Abe Cruz, David Cruz
This review was originally published on TV Geek Army.