“Why are you wearing the house frau dress from 1952?” – Patti
The cute little cold/open for this edition of The Millionaire Matchmaker involves office staffer Destin getting a spray tan, after which Patti exclaims, “You’re no longer a vampire!”
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Now back from the undead ranks, Destin introduces his “uber ultra rich guy” client, who does “production stuff and international distribution for films and TV.”
This turns out to be Jim Schramm, 44, who lives in Beverly Hills. In his intro video, he lets us know that he’s the “chairman of MPC Studios, a multimedia theatrical studio.” He claims that his company is worth $1 billion – but he does not do the Dr. Evil move with the pinkie, for what it’s worth.
Jim’s celebrity crush is the “Charlize Theron type,” which causes Patti to say, “Just because he has money, he thinks he can get that?”
Side note that it always amuses me that Patti will inquire what a client’s celebrity crush is, and then proceed to judge the choice. Would an unattractive celebrity crush cause her to have a different reaction, I wonder?
She then adds: “A tall drink of yoga water he cannot get, sorry.” So, that makes sense, sure.
Rachel’s millionaire client is 52 years old “and he goes by Jimmy.”
The moment Jim or Jimmy Grdina introduces himself via video, Patti blasts his all together normal (and expensive) Ralph Lauren blue sweater, saying, “Who told him to wear the polo ugly blue sweater, which, by the way, you put that on little kids.”
“It’s a Scottsdale look,” she adds, seemingly expecting everyone in the audience to react with, “Oh yeah, Scottsdale.”
Grdina is the owner of a company called Choice Motor Credit, and he says he’s worth between $7.5 and $15 million. That’s kind of a huge range, but who knows, what am I, an accountant? He goes on to talk about his 14,000 square foot house*. And he has 110 cars.
* Side note that my wife and I lived in a sub-900-foot house in southern California for years and we were quite happy there, thank you very much.
Patti scoffs at the 14,000 square foot house thing, which again is just a Scottsdale thing for her. This Jimmy also is a perfectionist, and his family calls his house a “museum” as everything is just so, I guess.
Oh, and both Jimmys are into cars and both have a crush on Charlize Theron.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: Patti meets the clients
Patti heads over to Hotel Erwin to meet up with “Jimmy G,” which is Jimmy Grdina and not Jimmy Garafolo, the NFL quarterback, if anyone is getting confused there.
On route that we learn that back in Scottsdale, Jimmy G’s specialty is “financing specialty cars,” which is a thing that I won’t pretend to know a thing about. And then we learn that he’s kind of OCD on a level of the bad guy / nightmare of an ex-husband in that one Julia Roberts movie from back in the day called Sleeping With the Enemy.
“I’ll walk around the house just repositioning things,” Jimmy notes with relation to what he’ll do after the cleaning crew has done their work.
We also get to see a montage of Jimmy working out without his shirt off as he explains how great he looks at 52. This is feeling very much in BowFlex informercial territory at this point.
Jimmy tells Patti that his ex-wife was a Playboy Playmate of the Year, and Patti quickly translates that it didn’t work out because “the penis was neglected.” But now Jimmy is looking for “the right one.”
Jimmy then tells Patti that the qualities that make him appealing include that he’s “organized,” which Patti counters with, “Yeah, but I don’t want to f— organized.”
After castigating Jimmy to the camera that he’s too “surface oriented,” Patti advises him to get a spray tan and bring his “A game” for the upcoming mixer.
Meanwhile, Jim Schramm brags about his wealth and fancy cars and private jets and such, but notes that “he does not lead with his money.” For example, he then brags, er, talks about how he “paid the bill” for a “little girl who was dying of leukemia.”
“I did it, but they didn’t know I did it,” he adds.
Patti is actually pretty insightful in cutting through Jim’s contradiction between what he says and how he acts, but then takes it pretty easy on him on next steps to pursue a serious relationship.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: the recruiting session & mixer
Top lines from Patti and Destin during the recruiting session for Jimmy G and Jim Schramm include:
- “Why are you wearing the house frau dress from 1952?” – Patti
- “Is there a body under there?” – Destin
- “Paint it! Show the girls!” – Patti, encouraging one of the young ladies to… dress more provocatively
- “The nurses of America want their shoes back.” – Patti
- “I think they’re granny panties underneath that dress.” – Patti
- “Every guy is gonna want to ride that ride.” – Patti on a woman named Selma
Heading into the mixer at Café Entourage, Patti is pleased that Jimmy G has gotten the spray tan, and she advises Jim Schramm to “not lead with your money.” Patti then reveals Jimmy G’s “sexy abs” to the ladies before the trademark “meet my millionaires!” is shouted.
For the mini-date round, Patti is disappointed in Jimmy G’s focus on the “exterior” in selecting Mindy (who Patti admits is perfect because it’s an Aquarius paired up with a Gemini, and don’t even get me started on this one please…) and Nasia, a realtor who hails from Germany. And Jim picks Selma and Erica for reasons including that they are brunettes and “not all over the place.” Kind of a reasonable notion, I suppose?
For the “master date,” Jimmy G hems and haws but eventually opts for a date with Nasia – where their connection seems to be purely about workout routines and fitness – while Jim goes for Selma, with whom he seemed to have a genuine and warm rapport.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: Jimmy G and Nasia’s first date
Jimmy G meets Nasia for a date to do indoor skydiving at iFly at what I believe is Universal City walk in Hollywood – a location that I and my family went to once upon a time*.
* Long story short: it was fun but I’m calling myself retired from skydiving of all kinds, thank you very much.
Nasia’s first reaction when she sees people flying around in an indoor skydiving silo: “Oh my god, I hope we’re not gonna do that.”
But indeed, they were gonna do that. Jimmy G admitted a little jealousy that the instructors were “all over” Nasia, but overall he found it to be an “exuberating” experience.
The couple then reunites for dinner, and Jimmy G hands her some flowers. Then, to the camera, he explains that Nasia was “certainly the woman in the best shape” at the mixer. This gave him “a good feeling” about her.
At dinner, Nasia’s language barrier becomes a factor, but really the chemistry-level seemed to be in the sub-zero range. Jimmy G goes on to explain that he didn’t enjoy the way that she would gesture while holding a knife or fork while speaking. Did I mention the creepy stalker, ultra OCD bad guy from the Julia Roberts movie yet? Oh, that’s right, I did.
The clincher seemed to be when Nasia explains that Jimmy G would find “shoes everywhere” if he came to her apartment. “I’m an extremely neat person,” he tells her.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: Jim and Selma’s first date
Jim has a limo drop Selma off at his studio, which Jimmy explains to the camera is “not leading with my money, it’s my life.”
He starts out by introducing Selma to John Milos, who is in the midst of some kind of high-end photo shoot. And the couple then “sneaks in” for a quick photo session commemorating their first date. Selma, a very affable-seeming woman, seems thrilled by the experience.
At a private dinner catered by chef Kate Mantelini, the two seem to have a genuine connection, and Jim is impressed that Selma runs a retirement home. The two end up sharing a kiss or two during the meal, and agree that they want to see each other again.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: post-dates upshot
Patti calls Nasia, who talks through the iFly visit and dinner date with Jimmy G. Patti quickly takes away that Jimmy was only interested in “physical attraction.” Jimmy then stops by the office, and tells Patti that his date with Nasia was “the most challenging” of his entire life.
Patti tells him that he’s akin to Shallow Hal. Nice early 2000s Farrelly brothers reference, Patti!
And then they end with a hug, as Patti feels like he learned from the experience.
Destin and Patti then call Selma, who says her date with Jim was “the best date of her life.” In the office, Jim confirms that the date was “incredible.”
Patti quickly cuts to the chase: “Did you get laid?” Jim demurs, but then says that the two have quickly agreed to be monogamous, thus conforming to the bylaws of The Millionaire’s Club. Patti, who would typically flip out at this point in the episode, lets him off the hook as he senses that Jim and Selma are committed to exploring a real relationship on top of being hot for each other.
“Another match made in heaven,” Patti tells the camera, with a self-satisfied sniff, after going 1-for-1 in this episode.
The end of episode credits then tell us: “Jimmy G and Nasia never went out again. He is back in Arizona looking for his ‘Perfect 8.’” And: “Jim and Selma have been on several more dates. They have been shopping for engagement rings.”
The Millionaire Matchmaker, “A Tale of Two Jimmys”: where are they now?
I was able to find Jim Grdina on Instagram, and his profile picture is… uh, I’d call it “old guy shredded,” but to be fair the dude is insane shape (and enjoys showing it off). He’s “64 years young” as of this writing and his bio says that he’s a “Loving Husband & Father,” so our guy obviously settled down at some point after his appearance on The Millionaire Matchmaker.
James Schramm, as he’s called on IMDB, has a bio page that talks about him as “a businessman and a visionary facilitating strategic partnerships in the entertainment, motion picture and media sector,” but doesn’t mention anything about his private life…
But there is a Selma Schramm on Instagram, people! But… there’s not much on it, and no pictures I can see of Jim and Selma together. So maybe they got married and divorced? Millionaire Matchmaker nation needs to know more…
I’ll post an update if I can dig more up on this (not that) fast breaking story.
Some stats and info about The Millionaire Matchmaker – “A Tale of Two Jimmys”
TV SHOW – The Millionaire Matchmaker
SEASON/EPISODE – Season 6, Episode 3
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – Bravo
AIR DATE – January 24th, 2013
GENRE – Reality TV, Dating Shows, Trashtastic TV
STARS – Patti Stanger, Destin Pfaff, Rachel Federoff, Jim Schramm, Jimmy Grdina
GOOGLE PLAY DESCRIPTION – Patti has a Jim and a Jimmy, and their names aren’t the only thing they have in common. First up is Jim Schramm, a 44-year-old entrepreneur from Beverly Hills who’s newly divorced and tends to show off his money. Patti has her work cut out for her with Jimmy Grdina, a 52-year-old divorcee from Scottsdale, AZ who is a perfectionist.