“We got a 46-year-old virgin over here.” – Rich
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: client intros
David, one of Patti Stanger’s new assistant/underlings in this season of The Millionaire Matchmaker, kicks things off by presenting a bunch of men’s thong underwear to the team.
Check out our full and snark-tastic Millionaire Matchmaker episode guide and updates! Trash and treasure in equal increments, we promise.
As the other underling staffer tries them on (outside of his pants, thankfully…), we’re let in on the gimmick that the underwear is a gift (bribe?) from Andrew Christian in an effort to become a client of The Millionaire’s Club.
Contrived reality show set-up to kick off the episode: check!
“He’s the guy that everyone talks about in Hollywood that has the underwear store,” Patti adds.
Cut to his video intro, and Andrew lets us know that he’s 35 years old and worth $4.2 million, which might be the most specific net worth ever provided on the show to date.
“Oh my god, he’s such a queen,” Patti says happily. This is with relation to our getting a read on the fact that Andrew is gay, but it’s also noteworthy that Patti very typically hates on her new clients at this stage in the episode… except for the more celebrity-ish ones.
“I’m like the gay Hugh Hefner,” Andrew goes on. “I have a playboy mansion.”
And indeed, we see a shot of Andrew’s multi-story house and pool overlooking Los Angeles, and it’s a crib that Vince, E, Turtle, and Drama from Entourage would be most stoked about.
Andrew also explains that he’s had trouble finding a long-term relationship because he’s not sure if guys are attracted to him due to his wealth. “After the sex is done, there’s really no substance to it, to the relationship,” he adds.
“Now I’m feeling sensitive toward gay Hugh Hefner,” Patti responds.
Patti and David fret that their challenge for the mixer will be to find guys who don’t already know who Andrew is. Millionaire’s Club problems, people.
Meanwhile, Patti mentions that her friend Kathy Wakile of The Real Housewives of New Jersey fame has asked Patti to take her younger sister, Rosie Pierri, on as a client even though she’s not a millionaire.
Rosie is gay but didn’t come out to her Italian American family until she was 35 years old. She’s now over 40, so Patti talks about the challenge of finding someone “age appropriate” for her.
Overall, Patti is amped to throw “a full gay mixer.” One of the underlings concurs with, “It’s gonna sparkle.”
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: Patti meets the clients
Kathy and Rosie meet Patti at what looks like a massive cupcake store or bakery. We also learn that Rosie is a project manager in the retail industry these days and has occasionally appeared on The Real Housewives of New Jersey (a show I have not watched a second of to date).
“Unlike The Real Housewives of New Jersey, the real Rosie has to go to work everyday and bust her ass,” so says real Rosie. Because she leaves in a small town, it’s been difficult for her to meet a woman to have a serious relationship with.
“We got a 46-year-old virgin over here,” Rich, the dude with Kathy says (her husband, I think), who I was unable to identify.
Rosie tells Patti that she’s a late bloomer, and that she doesn’t want to continue to lead a lonely life. She’s also looking for someone with some zest who can keep her on her toes.
“Jersey’s in the house, and I gotta make sure we represent,” Patti assures her.
While Patti heads over to meet Patti, we see a shot of Andrew’s opulent house and then dudes in very skimpy underwear (Andrew Christian’s design, no doubt) hanging out by his pool and milling about his store in West Hollywood (or WeHo, as Los Angelinos call it).
Andrew assures Patti that he’s ready to settle down and wants to leave the “gay Hugh Hefner” lifestyle behind.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: the recruiting session and mixer
Kathy and Rich sit in with Patti and crew for Rosie’s mixer, where an “age-appropriate lipstick lesbian” is the goal. Highlights of the recruiting session include:
- Patti asks Shyra, a model/singer who is openly bi-sexual, “How often do you flip?”
- Patti then excoriates underling Justin for the quality of ladies he’s produced as potentials for Rosie, saying, “Is this the best you can do? I’m like really disappointed in you.”
- Patti then implies that a professed lesbian who was previously married and has five kids is not a “real lesbian” (and she uses language that is way, way crasser than that as well). “I think that’s disrespectful,” the woman tells her, and I heartily agree.
- Tristan, an investor, is told, “Burn the dress, burn the shoes.”
Then for Andrew’s recruiting session, “non-gold digger college grads” is the target demo:
- Patti invites a dude with abs to open his shirt before rubbing him down and announcing, “Slip and slide!” in a singsong voice.
- Another dude gets down to his skivvies on command.
- Scott, a Harvard grad and accounting recruiter, tells the team that he’s “gold star gay.”
For the mixer, Patti adjusts her typical announcement by exclaiming, “Meet my gay millionaires!” The mixer theme is a smaller, dinner mixer as opposed to the big, open cocktail parties that often take place on The Millionaire Matchmaker.
The party was set up as two different tables, with one for the boys and one for the girls. Patti dominated the girls’ table, eventually calling one woman a “California whore” after she changed the topic to something “more interesting,” which turned into “what is the most interesting place you had sex in?”
At the boys’ table, Davee professed to being a “closet stripper” and was immediately ordered to twerk, while Daniel admitted to where he “maybe” used the zucchini he grows… with regard to his own body.
So this wasn’t a state of global and economic affairs-centric dinner party is what we’re trying to say here.
In the end, Andrew selects Daniel based on his goofy sense of humor, while Rosie goes with Guinevere Turner, who turns out very impressively to have co-written the screenplay to American Psycho, an outstanding movie starring Christian Bale.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: Rosie and Guinevere’s first date
Rosie has Guinevere meet her at a little marina, where a kayaking adventure is on tap. What’s striking as they meet is that Guinevere is dressed in a striking blue polka dotted dress and heels, Rosie is wearing an open shirt with t-shirt underneath that reads, “PHAT BURN – GET IT ON.”
“If you get all wet, you’re not gonna get all upset, are you?” Rosie asks her.
“I must seem like a total girl, don’t I?” Guinevere says, as she gamely gets out on the water in the duel-seated kayak.
The two do seem to have an easy rapport, and kayaking seems to be a great way that they can get to know each other while being in close proximity out on the water. For example, when Rosie relays that part of her job is being “a little bit of a pain in the ass,” Guinevere quips, “Really? I wouldn’t have guessed that about you.”
So Rosie’s desire to find someone with some spunk is right on point.
Over dinner, the conversation gets a little deeper, getting into their past relationship histories. “I’m not a jumper,” Rosie says regarding how seriously she treats relationships.
Overall, the two seem to have some real rapport and perhaps even chemistry.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: Andrew and Daniel’s first date
Andrew takes Daniel to Prado Restaurant down in San Diego’s Balboa Park neighborhood.
Over dinner, the two both get kind of smiley, which is rather sweet, and Andrew seems to enjoy Daniel’s goofy little anecdotes, such as one about getting stuck in skinny jeans that he tried on in Nordstrom’s dressing room.
Things take an odd turn when a guy breaks into their conversation to remind Andrew that he had modeled for him at one time, something that apparently happens to him all the time back in his home ‘hood in West Hollywood.
Andrew later takes Daniel to an “event,” which turns out to be some kind of bachelor party thing where Andrew is playing emcee. Unsurprisingly, it involves “hot underwear models.”
He also warns Daniel that he’ll have to leave him on his own for a bit. Andrew frames this to the camera as a way to see if Daniel can fit into his “world,” but it does not seem like a great first date move with someone you’re attempting to explore a real relationship with.
Then, there’s a twist and Andrew invites Daniel to be in the “show,” which he happily accepts. So to his credit, he adorns some very skimpy underwear and shakes his wears on the stage.
Andrew concludes that Daniel can potentially fit into his lifestyle, so who knows what’s next for these crazy kids.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: post-dates update
Patti and underling Justin call up Guinevere to find out how the date with Rosie went, and she relays Rosie is great and funny but that it’s not necessarily a “love connection.” They then call Rosie via Skype, who says that she enjoyed the date, and that Guinevere is “attractive in her own way.” She also conveys that she now feels more comfortable getting back out into the dating scene.
Patti bends over backwards to congratulate herself on a job well done with Rosie, but it seems like she’s placing the bar pretty low for herself, I’d say.
David and Patti then call Daniel, who says the date with Andrew was “awesome,” and that a second date is already set up. Andrew then stops by the office and discusses how refreshing it was to meet someone “with something to talk about.”
Patti simply says, “Wow, you’re bold,” regarding Daniel taking Andrew to his fashion show (and having him model on stage), which I’m convinced would have been a completely different reaction (read = psychotic flip out meltdown) if the client hadn’t held some form of celebrity in Patti’s eyes.
Even so, Patti admits to the camera, “That is not first date material,” and implies that she let Andrew off the hook because Daniel “liked it.”
The end of episode credits then tell us: “After her experience with Guinevere, Rosie has more confidence. She has started dating a girl back on the East Coast.” And: “Andrew Christian has left his gay Hugh Hefner image behind. He and Daniel are very happy together.”
So we’ll give Patti a soft 1-1 record for this edition of The Millionaire Matchmaker.
The Millionaire Matchmaker, Rosie Pierri & Andrew Christian: where are they now?
For two relatively (somewhat?) high profile people, it’s hard to get a read on either Rosie or Andrew’s personal life these days.
A BravoTV.com piece does feature a brief update on Rosie, and it seems she’s doing well, having recently vacationed in Fort Lauderdale with her mom, Maria, and sister.
Some stats and info about The Millionaire Matchmaker – “The Late Bloomer and The Gay Hugh Hefner”
TV SHOW – The Millionaire Matchmaker
SEASON/EPISODE – Season 7, Episode 4
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – Bravo
AIR DATE – January 2nd, 2014
GENRE – Reality TV, Dating Shows, Trashtastic TV
STARS – Patti Stanger, Rosie Pierri, Andrew Christian
GOOGLE PLAY DESCRIPTION – Rosie Pierri is a 46-year-old furniture project manager whose sister, Kathy Wakile, is on “The Real Housewives of New Jersey”. Rosie is a late bloomer as she didn’t come out until later in life and has had very few relationships. Can Patti help Rosie get her confidence up enough to return to the dating pool so she can find a lasting girlfriend or wife? Patti’s second client this week, Andrew Christian, 35, is a famous underwear designer who is looking for his special mate. He has underwear models at his beck and call, and he says he’s looking for someone real and intelligent, but is he just looking for a set of legs? A double gay episode as Patti and her new assistants look for appropriate gay men and lesbians for their two famous clients!