“We were in the s—s right off the bat.” – Chris
We head to Cranbury, New Jersey, in this edition of Kitchen Nightmares – a quaint town an hour outside of Manhattan – where we find a French bistro called Hannah & Mason’s.
Chris and Brian were employees of the restaurant at one point, but “jumped at the opportunity” to buy the place three years earlier.
With a flat vocal affect, Chris talks about how he decided to go into business with his co-worker because Brian was able to put up half the money, but later realized that it was a mistake.
Meanwhile, Brian tells the camera that he’s “laid back” and doesn’t let a lot of things bother him.
What Brian deems “laid back,” multiple Hannah and Mason’s staffers call lazy.
“I just always find it difficult to be motivated… and I find it difficult to change,” Brian adds.
Chris, who serves as head chef, also notes that the partnership is “unequal,” adding that he pays most of the bills, orders food, and “works the prep line for most dinners.”
Now, debts are rising as is stress, putting our guy Gordon Ramsay in the perfect position to come in and attempt to produce a massive turnaround.
When Ramsay enters Hannah and Mason’s, he’s greeted by the young manager, Nick, and sat at a table by Marie, a server. Ramsay samples the onion soup, quiche, and lamb lollipops, and when served remarks that the dishes have “zero out of zero for presentation” and that the soup tastes like dregs from out of the dishwasher.
On the lamb lollipops: it’s simply “hideous.”
After his meal, Ramsay meets with Hannah and Mason’s owners, and after letting them know how wretched his meal was, he soon discovers that the restaurant is only open three nights a week for dinner.
On top of that, Chris quickly calls out Brian for his lack of passion.
If Chris’ affect is flat, Brian’s is flat lined as he (slowly) says, “I don’t know what you’re looking for.”
It’s Valentine’s Day, so that night the restaurant is more crowded than usual.
Here’s how Chris describes how dinner service goes with regard to dealing with Ramsay’s criticism – and in general, perhaps: “We were in the s—s right off the bat.”
We see a hilarious montage (unless you’re a Hannah and Mason’s customer) where we see a clock ticking up to a full 20 minutes while cooked and plated food sits in the pass getting cold, and while diners get increasingly agitated.
Seems our extremely laid-back guy Brian may not be best poised to have a career as an “expeditor” of anything.
As Ramsay gets increasingly taciturn and agitated about the shoddy processes and sloppy food orders, Brian tells the camera that he’s “not going to cry about it” and that “life goes on.”
Ramsay then goes thermonuclear when he discovers the following in quick succession:
- A rock-hard dessert from a week-old display case has been served to a real, live customer
- Another dessert in the display case, bread pudding, somehow(??) has a piece of shrimp stuck in the middle of it, and it’s “bubbling” as part of its process of rotting, one supposes
This prompts Ramsay to further investigate the food storage situation at Hannah and Mason’s, which of course helps further fuel his righteous freakout.
We then reach DEFCON 1 (that’s the most serious kind, kids and keen observers of the classic cold war flick, War Games) when Ramsay discovers cooked chicken being stored literally right on top of raw chicken in the refrigerator.
Ramsay then utters an all-time Kitchen Nightmares moment when he howls, “Chris, it’s f—ing chicken against raw chicken!”
I then cracked up loud and hard when he derisively calls Brian Panini Head.
“This is Valentine f—ing massacre,” the British chef goes on.
And with that, Ramsay shuts down Hannah and Mason’s mid-service and kicks the diners out of the restaurant.
At a staff meeting, Ramsay calms down a bit but tells everyone that what happened is “deeply unacceptable.”
He reserves the bulk of his ire to co-owner Brian, telling him, “You did Jack s—, mate,” and “You make me sick.”
Ramsay tours the town the next day and observes how much farmland exists in this part of New Jersey. He also visits a Farmer’s Market and buys a bunch of local produce.
Upon returning to Hannah and Mason’s, Brian is sarcastic and mumble-y in reaction to Ramsay’s produce haul – think oh great, more apples, wonderful – which sets off Gordon yet again.
“You are incredibly soulless when it comes to food,” he tells Brian, clearly summoning new ways to rip apart a restaurant owner he clearly detests by this point.
“You’re entitled to your opinion,” Brian mumble/whispers back.
Meanwhile, Ramsay gives Chris a lesson with the idea of preparing new specials for that evening’s service. At the same time, Brian wanders around threatening to “not be here tonight” if Ramsay keeps it up.
It’s really clear that Brian is super passive aggressive, and Ramsay’s hounding him isn’t getting anywhere. Eventually, he tells Ramsay he’s being “a dick about” how he’s being treated and how being called Panini Head is a sixth-grade move.
The fascinating thing is that Brian isn’t necessarily wrong in his assessments, but at the same time Ramsay is 1,000% correct that Brian’s lazy, mumble-through-the-day managerial style is helping to drive his business to an early grave.
Eventually, Brian grudgingly concedes to the camera that he needs to show more passion than he’s “perceived to have.”
That night, Ramsay heralds the success of the new special and says that Hannah and Mason’s needs to lean even further into locally sourced ingredients and dishes.
The next day, Ramsay unveils the overnight renovation – it looks like a modest upgrade visually, but the staff flips out about how great it looks. It’s also designed to show off the local produce, which is showcased near the counter and looks rather nice. The most dramatic change is more in terms of concept – the restaurant is framed as an “upscale café and no longer a French bistro.”
Chris did not flip out over the reno, and in fact he expresses his anxiety about the level of change going on. Further, he tells the camera that the “obliteration” of the old Hannah and Mason’s “is not gonna work.”
The overhauled menu reflects the new restaurant concept, and includes a ribeye sandwich, smoked chicken salad, beef hash with eggs, free range chicken stew, and grilled swordfish with tarragon mashed potatoes.
The focus for relaunch night is to “flip the tables” so that the restaurant gets two complete seatings in during dinner service. Ramsay and Chris get into some kind of blowup over Chris’ attempt to sub out mashed potatoes to help speed things up, but it seems a little overblown for reality TV show editing purposes.
Relaunch night goes successfully, and the goal of two complete seatings is completed. Later that night, Ramsay emphasizes the importance of “quality control,” and also encourages both Chris and Brian to continue to raise the bar and find the stoke the passion to succeed.
It does seem like some small miracle that both Ramsay and Brian seem to somewhat get along by episode’s end.
🍽 Want more? Check out Pop Thruster’s Kitchen Nightmares episode reviews (there’s a lot).
Some stats and info about Kitchen Nightmares, “Hannah and Mason’s”
TV SHOW – Kitchen Nightmares
NETWORK/STREAMING SERVICE – FOX
GENRE – Reality TV, Docuseries, Food Shows
EPISODE DESCRIPTION – Chef Ramsay visits French bistro Hannah and Mason’s. Owned by two friends who lack business skills and motivation, the restaurant administers bounced checks to the staff.
CAST – Gordon Ramsay